break up schmake up.. it aint no thang

I swear whoever wrote the lyrics to "breaking up is hard to do" was right on the money. unfortunately the odds are not in us ladies' favors when it comes to this traumatic experience, lol. in fact, most of us will experience at least one heart breaking break up sometime in our lines, and 1 out of every 3 females experience one that leads them to having mental issues that can severely affect her life. although no one can fully prepare you for and there are a few breakup words that will ease your pain, i can at least try to.. lol i'll always still believe advice goes a long way.

So listen up biiiiiits!!! here is how you can be closer to healing your broken heart.

Here are my stages of grief that i think girls will most likely experience throughout a break up.. the five stages of grief as they apply to a breakup that is:

denial: && "no it's not just a river in Egypt". you deny the break-up has happened and isolate yourself from your loved ones. to help get through this stage, accept what has happened and don’t be afraid to ask for support from those who love you and are there for you.. i know you might not want to hear it but face the fucken truth && do it. without doing this first step, you will not make it to the second. you might tell yourself this is just a temporary separation; you’re bound to kiss and make up.

resisting the urge: i knowwww it’s difficult to fight the urge to get in touch with your ex, but you have to resist it. && yes, this means no making up excuses to see him (I have to get back my one sock back...) etc. been there done that .. and the visits only lead to hot, amazing sex that gives him the upper hand yet again. You have to say NO.

anger: it's only natural to become angry with your ex and maybe even with yourself for the cause or circumstances of the breakup. personally, what i did to help deal with my anger was wrote a letter addressed to my ex, without the intention of giving it to him of course, cus i'd probably hit a nerve no girl wants to hit. It is amazing how you can really get down and dirty with your feelings, and how you end up pouring your heart out once the point of your pen leaks onto the paper. After you’re done, put it aside and come back to it another day, reread it once, then toss it if you want. i actually saved all of mine, mainly because i didn't really write them when we broke up because we only have once, but more so when we got into an argument or at a time i felt incredibly hurt by him.. i go back to them after a while and it's weird how i have a totally new perspective on things. this eventually lead to me keeping a journal of my feelings. Looking back on the things I wrote reminded me of our low points. I needed that reminder to get away from him, and stay.

Ladies, this method works best for me because i think writing can be incredibly therapeutic. i know most not feel this way, but obviously with my having my own blog site, i'm going to feel taht way.

bargaining: this is probably the most common thing females tend to do.. i can almost guarantee it, don't deny it. you bargain with your ex to take you back, telling him that you were wrong, what changes you’ll make, and so on. Or, you get others involved in trying to get him back for you. This stage often involves irrational actions such as calling him no matter how trivial the reason. don't fall lame to the game baby girls! you have to be on top of it, have HIM come crawling back to you!

acceptance: this is about the final stage of grief i think we all endure. the female typically comes to terms with the breakup, and she no longer feels anger or deep sadness about it. While thinking about your ex is still normal, you’re able to move on with your life to be productive and emotionally healthy again. Some females have a hard time coming to this stage, I think it takes an incredible amount of strength and dignity to even follow through with passing this stage. With acceptance comes the ability to move on.



But you shouldn’t expect all of the above to happen overnight. It will take time, faith in yourself and a supportive group of friends and family to get you through.

the most important thing i can say ladies is back away from zeee ex!!! real talk! i know you're in the bargaining stage of grieving the demise of a what seemed to be an amazing relationship, so you may try to get in touch with him. But, there are two reasons why calling, emailing or visiting his crib is a BAD idea. why? just because you convince yourself your ex is thinking about you just as much as you're thinking about him. he's not. but the next reason is the more contact you have with him, the less likely you’ll be able to move on. Every time you write to him, talk to him or visit his house, you’re taking a step backward instead of forward. not only that but it makes you look completely desperate and gives him the upper hand.

i seriously only think of these two specific quotes when i think of getting over a break up and/or when healing a broken heart: “Time heals all wounds” and “Where one door closes, another one opens.” i know, kind of cheesy but absolutely true . while you may not be able to see the light at the end of the dark tunnel now, ii can guarantee that the day will come when you’ll know that your broken heart has officially healed.





good luck girls

Drug Store Everyday Item Haul xx

 Hello beauty queens !!!  I wanted to share a quick haul of quick, affordable, personal items you can get at your local drugstore. Check them out below !!

I have been having a very hard time finding a good, thick, winter cover up that is not going to make me look pasty or gross.I bought the Just Face It by Hard Candy because I have used theGlamoflauge heavy duty concealer and fell in love with that product.  Only thing I liked about this product is that it provided great coverage. However, the strangest thing is these little flakes of what looks to be plastic were all over my face after application.  It doesn't make my skin break out, but it does last all day. this foundation does NOT work well with contouring/blending.  Any blending at all, it also dries really quickly. I used the medium (363) shade.

I tried the Revlon Photo Ready Airbrush Foundation, and was not happy with it at all. I knew it was going to be a light consistency -- just not THAT light. I felt like I got barely any coverage. It's greasy, dispenses only huge amounts at a time, doesnt stay on, and again, the coverage is poor!  

I will NOT be repurchasing this product.

The Loreal True Match Natural Powder is one of my all time favorite holy grail products in which i have reviewed before. nothing bad to say about that product other than I wish the brush was softer :)

my shade is natural beige 

Wal-Mart panties are actually some of my favorite panties to wear. LOL It is hard to believe, but they fit nicely, last a long time, and some can be very sexy and sultry ;) They are only like $2.99 each so I always buy 5-10 pairs at a time. I bought 7 pairs above, along with No Nonsense 6 pack of white and black socks.

Two new mascaras

One is the Loreal Telescopic which is a very comb like brush to add length to your lashes.  This mascara barely clumps, the brush is  ideal for lengthening. One thing I would note is that if you were looking for a lot of volume in your lashes, this mascara won't give you volume. That is why I also use ....

The other Maybelline falsies mascar! THIS mascara is the volume queen bee. LOL it applies evenly, does not clump, and is a perfect combo with the lorel telescopic. Only negative about both is that it is very hard to remove them at night time. 

Three new lip glosses!!

Rimmel London Show Off Lacquer -- Shade: Light Year. this gloss is super pigmented, very glossy, and i found myself wiping the outside of my lips every five minutes because it just did NOT want to stay ON my lips. Perhaps it would work better going over a lipstick so it has something to latch onto. Besides that, the color is gorgeous!

Lip infallible and Loreal Truffle are two simple glosses I use for every day events.

Two new lipsticks !! 

Maybelline Super Stay 14hr matte lipstick in Beige Foregood -- this is one of my holy grail products. Be sure to exfoliate your lips prior to any matte lip products as if not, your lips will look gross. I love the conveniant little container, they have great color selection-- long lasting, and very true to color. Only con would be some of the colors I like have shimmer in them and others do not. I wish they had it all universally the same with or without shimmer, as I dont like the shimmer part. Drying Shimmer doesnt feel right.


Revlon Color Burst Lip in Creme Brulee -- LOVE this lipstick. it is a nude & cafe mocha mixed in one topped with shimmer. you get a decent color pay off and it does moisturize. But I have very dry lips from having bad allergies, therefore this product will emphasis them when worn alone. I tried applying a clear balm prior to application, and loved it.


Aveeno Positively Ageless Skin Strengthening Lotion

I was literally out of travel size hand lotion, and quickly scanned the lotion isle for a miniature aveeno lotion. i almost never go wrong with any aveeno products. and this product was no different.

i generally use it after i wash my hands, as i do 1000x a day, and some times feel i do not need to reapply after a hand wash just with how moisturized my skin feels.

it smells great, very soft and moisturizing. the littlest bit spreads very evenly and covers greatly. it is not the least bit greasy. i absolutely love aveeno lotions <3

Here is a really cool picture of the sky as I was walking out of the drug store, doesn't it look pretty cool? I love the sky-- and since I am out far west of the city the majority of the time, I see the sky so much clearer as opposed to seeing it with all the city's pollution blocking its beauty. Ahh.. soothing :)

new years eve dresses xx

NEW YEARS!

woo! who is as excited to get the hell away from 2013 as i am ?? i was recently invited to this huge N.Y.E party at the Hilton downtown, and after going through my wardrobe, i just said "forget it-- great glam it is"

www.GreatGlam.com is a website with the most gorgeous dresses, shoes, any thing glam for the very cheap! i have known about it for quite a while. all the dresses i am listing below were between $25-30 each. now remember i was opting for a more calm, but sexy look. I didn't want extreme patterns, or bright bright colors because it is a New Years eve party. 

This is an all black jumpsuit that i know is kind of 'out there' if you knew any thing about my style. lol i am considering it for its warmth, as well as to play it up with accessories. red close toed pumps and a red lipstick <3

I see this type of style on Kim Kardashion a lot. She does the whole waist accentuated bit. i want it because i have a very round bottom half, and think this dress would make that look a bit more ... tight?

Unlike the model, I was thinking a tight pony tail with a bump-it oomph, long dangling sparkly earrings with black pumps.

Unlike the model, my chest is very far from bulging out. i think because of that fact this dress would look sooo much more fabulous on me. I have black pumps with leopard print on the bottom sole that would go perfectly with this. Black dangling earrings and bangles, no necklace.

Again, minimal chest thing works to my advantage with these types of dresses. i really like being able to breath but yet keeping my curves in check lol This isn't one of my favorites, but definitely a consideration because i have metallic bangles that would match nicely with the metallic stripes on the top.

This is one of my favorites. I just love the sleeves. Hair straight down, a minimal necklace and my sparkly pumps. they kind of have a gold tint to them though so i may just decide to do the black pumps.













Okay I think I narrowed it down enough. Can my beautiful followers help me out by picking your favorite one ??

Help me out mamasitas!!

xox rica

trust -- learned or innate behavior?

One of the main topics I write about is trust. i am not sure why, but it is as if i can write and write and write nonstop about it.  trust is a really hard thing. it's hard to win but super easy to lose. you can spend years building it up, and it's amazing how it can shatter in seconds.. when you put your trust in someone it means that you will expect them to do what they say they will do, which is usually something that you should be doing for yourself but rely on them enough to do for you.. Trusting in someone usually means that there is something they have that you believe you need, or something you have that you believe they can take away to cause you harm. You may not agree, but i have thought long and hard about this & this is def the conclusion i have come to and won't budge onto any other..

Truth is much trickier than we think it is, isn't it?

My freshmen year I already learned what two-faced and back stabbing meant. you couldn't find a person you could trust in sight. If you had a real friend that you could trust, it didn't last long, or at least the trust didn't. It was either some one said something, or boyfriends/girlfriends got in the way. it  could be that you were completely innocent but it wouldn't matter as long as the drama was made. a year long relationship could be ruined by someone you didn't even know as long as they swore to it. every time, its your fault. don't get me wrong sometimes your not innocent but I'm hoping you will have the nerve to admit when your wrong, i know i do... but your words well be scrabbled and screwed then they make a scene and when you don't stir back your "scared."

honesty is the backbone of healthy relationships. i know sometimes its hard to be honest, but when you are, people know that they can trust you and when people trust you... you will be able to go far.  emotions are powerful.  we usually don’t realize how much they affect our lives and the lives of those around us, but they lie behind every thing we say or do even though most of the time we are not aware of them.

remember the first time you fell in love? What were your emotions doing? Did you let things bother you or did you let thing slide? now think of your most heart wrenching break up. What were your emotions doing? Did you let things bother you or did you let things slide? our emotions affect how we see, hear or even do things, most of the time it’s immediately, however sometimes it affects how we see things the next day or a week from the event. usually we don’t even realize the power they have had on us.

this is why i put a lot of effort into controlling my anger the most. i sometimes say a lot of things i don't mean to and this makes me feel soo horrible at the end of the day. my boyfriend and i used to have some pretty bad fights, and we would say hurtful things quite often. we have since worked on that path of communication and he hasn't said something to hurt me in months, and we are still going strong. no matter how hard the situation or fight, it can alwaysss be worked out-- communication is key and it is very essential in making a path of understanding and a clearer future.

that's all i am going to right on that tonight. i lost a friend tonight over pathetic bullshit -- happened before but as you can see we didn't use our communication skills to the best of our ability and now we are in the exact same boat -- but you live and learn, right?

out with the old in with the new.

I'm Not Really A Waitress #NOTD xx

I had a good night last night. Not only was there finally a shitload of snow, blah but pretty :) but i woke up this morning with $100 extra in my pocket. I have no idea how either. Must've been the alcohol. yep, i shall blame it on that. Yeeesh. 

Due to the state of exhaustion that my entire body is in, I am going to keep it light today. Maybe watch a movie or run some errands. Pet my cat. Oh, and possibly give myself a pedicure with this fabulous nail polish color I found.

O.P.I. Nail Lacquer in "I'm Not Really A Waitress"



www.labellavitax0x.blogspot.com

Isn't that the greatest name? :)

Happy Hump Day.

the shark week craze

in some ways, the Shark Week obsession makes sense. it's almost like a sadistic fascination with horror stories of surfer boys, children, marine biologists, or fishermen turning into chopped liver. it's one of those so disgusting but can't stop looking type gigs.

...&& i cannot get enough.

Shark week is not only about the gory stories. it also is very very informative. i see shark week as a chance to shed light on the difficulties faced by sharks in the wild. for instance, did you know that more than 100 million sharks are killed around the world each year by commercial fishing. also that sharks alongside crocodiles are the world's oldest living animals believed to be older than dinosaurs? they've been on this planet for billions of years.



Not only that but let's face it.. sharks are awesome. I mean, how many other people know that sharks have five 15 rows of teeth in each jaw? Or that a lot of weird things have been found inside sharks, such as a nail, a bottle of wine, a treasure chest, coats, a suit of armor, a drum and a torpedo. Oh and a question: What is more dangerous to people - a shark or a wasp/bee? Answer: wasp/bee!! Every year, 100 people die from wasp or bee stings, yet hundreds of millions of people go swimming, and sharks kill only about six people worldwide. Only about 25 sharks have been known to actually attack people. Every year, people kill thousands of sharks. They are killed for food, oil, skins and sport.

Here are some other things i learned from shark week 2013...

• Sharks do not have bones.
• it's a shark-eat-shark world ...parents sometimes eat their embroyos and even the babies, once they develop teeth they eat their brothers and sisters who are not yet developed. . yuck!! it's called intrauterine cannibalism. i'll never forget. haha 
• Most sharks have good eyesight.
• Sharks have special electroreceptor organs.
• the way sharks breathe is by ram ventilation, a process that forces water into their mouths and then processes it as they swim forward.
• Shark skin feels similar to sandpaper.
• Sharks can go into a trance
• Sharks have been around a very long time.
• Scientists age sharks by counting the rings on their vertebrae.
• Blue sharks are really blue.
• Every once in a while, a female shark can reproduce without any contact from a male, an act known as parthenogenesis. Scientists have only documented a couple of cases of parthenogenesis, but some suspect that just about any female shark can get pregnant on her own in the right circumstances.

Twitter: http://twitter.com/#!/sharkweek
About Shark Week: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shark_Week

mid-year reflection

I often take a few minutes out of my hectic days every several months throughout the year to reflect on my progress at completing my new years resolutions, and life goals in general. i think this helps me keep my mind on track on what it should be on track of, and not let myself stray too far away on life's distractions.

The last year has been so full of ups and downs, hills and valleys. Some of the happiest moments of my life, and the very worst. Oprah Winfrey made a good point today, when someone asked her how she was, she talked about how all we know and can cling to is faith. faith.. now that is a word that feels good to say :)

this new year, a few of my main goals were to get into a more stable job, work on maintaining an excellent relationship with my loved ones, expand my modeling portfolio, and let my creativity run wild.

Stable Job: I moved to the west coast & found an amazing job as an Administrative Assistant. I loved it in Arizona. Beautiful views, weather, people, etc. However it was very slow-paced. I am from Chicago, so I need that fast paced atmosphere. I love music, and need to feel it in my soul at least once a week! I moved back home because I was missing my family terribly. I am now living in the house my fiance's grandma left him when she passed away last year, and trying to take it day by day. Thankfully, I was able to get my old job back as the Sales Assistant!

Relationships: anyone who knows my ex and i know we argue quite a bit. it's almost as if we must do in order to have a normal day. no one else in this world can bring out the absolute worse in me but the very next minute he brings out the best as well. i am still trying to figure us out, but so far this road has been intense but every bit exhilarating. 

As far as expanding my creativity, I wanted to branch off of things my mother in law was doing. Her and I have endless supplies to pretty much do anything I want. I started a few scrapbooks. I am making one just of my life, which kind of turned into mine and my fiance's life LOL and another one of the people in my life, my homes, views, states ive lived in, friends, family, etc etc. Not only that but I also am making holiday cards, which are pretty detailed. i'll upload some pics soon to show you guys a peek. I got the idea from my mommy in law who does such an incredible job on them... and she does it for fun! She eventually began to make lots and sell them, but it started off just for her own fun. Isn't that ironic how the greatest ideas start off not as something serious in the first place? haha

Enough of that, now onto a bit more serious note mentally.. onto something else that has been weighing on my mind..

So there have been a few times that i have started to write, but realized that some of my thoughts were too raw, and didn't want to be too mysterious, making people wonder if it's them i'm talking about, etc. so i did some processing myself .. && i've realized a few things.

1:: i'm in the process of mourning a friendship that will never be the same again. it's hard knowing that you have reached the point where you were the closest, and that that will probably never happen again. it's hard to just fall off each others radars and not feel like a big chunk of you is missing. i don't know how to explain it, but it's been weighing on my heart the last few weeks. it's not like it was an argument that could have been prevented either... i always knew this particular thing about her would have came between us, i just always tried to ignore it but there just comes a time in life where you have to not associate yourself with things of that nature, and i came to it.

2:: i've also realized is that i desperately want to really talk to people I haven't in a while. I want to ask them how they are. I want this in return. I think that if you don't have people asking about you and the state of your heart then it is easy to let that get pushed to the back burner and allows you to not take care of your heart or address it in the state that it is in.

3:: i've realized (i mean, i always knew this but..) i am an excessive talker, it doesn't take a lot of questions to get me rolling, which i guess ties into the previous point. i always find myself, especially on facebook, writing things so vividly and in graphic detail so the other person can visualize what it is i am trying to say. not only that, but i also like to express all of my emotions in my writing, so i always include smiley emoticons, etc and i use repetition of letters to express an emphasis like haaaaaaaaaappy birthday! haha sometimes i walk away from conversations being like "wow, i just dumped that on that person, and they don't even want to know about it", but if they had asked it would've felt like more of a conversation... lol Make sense?

4: lastly, there are only a handful people in my life now that i would consider my close friends that i genuinely care for about enjoy being around. I love this. It would be very easy to dwell on the fact that that number used to be bigger, but that i want to CHOOSE to dwell on how fortunate i am to have even the people that i do have with me to this day. i need to choose to be thankful for those that are there, because dwelling on anything else doesn't help at all.

so dear friends, know that i am thankful for you, probably more than you know.

So as you can see my mid-year reflections are quite excessive, and I tend to blabber on and on and on. So if you're still reading, high five to you girlfren!!! (yes, i am assuming that not a single male read this, i know i am right lol.)