So I've been on Facebook && Myspace quite a bit lately, and I've been seeing so many different friends of mine saying how much they hate themselves. And while I am sure all of them have their own version of each reason, I pretty much summed it up to a few reasons why:
rejection. love. acceptance. hitting life's bottom.
(A) Rejection We all must face rejection in our lives. Rejection from members of the opposite sex, rejection over a promotion at work, rejection at a life that does not measure up to the big plans we once had. Rejection will come, but we must not let it consume us. I have learned in the past that when rejection comes, it is not the end of the world. Sure, there are times I am depressed for a little while and there is a lot of self-examination, but over time I learned that rejection is not the end, but the beginning of something else.
(B): Love and Acceptance It is human nature to want to feel the love and acceptance of others, but when it doesn't happen in our timetable, we often turn to ourselves as the source of our failure. When someone does not accept or show love to you, don't hate yourself for it. Rather, take time to consider the situation surrounding why you were not accepted or loved. In the end, you will realize (like I did) that not everyone is going to accept you and love you. If you stay true to who you are, sooner or later you will find the love and acceptance you are looking for.
(C): Hitting Rock Bottom Have you ever felt like you've hit bottom? I'm talking about those times when you say, "If I only had one break, I know I could get out of this situation I am in." I can't help but think of Eminem's song titled "Rock Bottom." At one time in my life, that song spoke to my more clear than I spoke to myself. I related to it so much... every word. I know I have had quite a few times like that in my life and it is not a nice feeling. Many times when we are at rock bottom, we become extremelyyy depressed that can lead to self-pity and self-pity can cause us to say, "I hate myself" for not being able to get out of this.. and this can lead to many other things such as drug or alcohol addiction.
Most of the time when we hit rock bottom it is by circumstances of our own making. In our minds, we feel that since we are the one who caused the problem we should be the ones to get ourselves out of the problem. When things continue to spiral downward, we start to play the blame game which always leads to wrong conclusions about ourselves. In the end, we start to hate ourselves for allowing things to get this bad. When you hit bottom, don't hate yourself. Swallow your pride and seek help elsewhere...don't be in denial.
I know my strengths and weakness and I am going to make more mistakes, but I can't let the mistakes get to me. I know it sounds simple and it will take work, but when you make a mistake, learn from it and move on.
Sometimes we hate ourselves for not living up to our own or anothers' expectations. The fact is that sooner or later most of us in our lifetime are going to utter the word's "I hate myself." The words "I hate myself" by themselves hold no power over us, but the problem starts when you begin to believe the words.
Oddly enough, all the above reasons are reasons I have personally dealt with in the past. There were times I hated who I was and wanted to change myself so I could be like everyone else. Then one day I realized that I am not like everyone else. I am me, so I set out to be me and I soon found that I no longer hated myself. I did not take the things that happened to me so personally anymore. I do not know if it will work for you, but isn't it worth a shot? what do you honestly have to lose?
Monday, January 14, 2013
Tuesday, January 01, 2013
hello to all my lovelies!
this is my little spot where i can express all the thoughts that go on in this noggin' of mine. i'm very vivacious, and most definitely cannot be tamed. What I post is what appeals to me, what I'm going through in life, and just what goes on in this mind. It will be random. It will be fabulous. & I guarantee it will keep you addicted.
as mentioned above, i am new to the blogging world; however, i've been writing all my life. i love to keep records of my life. things i go through, stuff i learn, the various types of people i meet, the multiple jobs i have and how i got them, etc etc. why? because at the end of the year, i just love reading back on it and most of the time i end up saying "wow, i'm so glad i wrote that down because i would have never remembered it." and of course the few times i say "wtf, i was sooo stupiddd!!" lol so let's get to know a little about me & where i live.
first things first - my name. RICA. it's a nickname my boyfriend gave to me because i am puerto RICAn. & i needed something to go by because i don't always like telling people i don't really know or like my real name-- not to mention i really hate my real name. haha ;]
i live in chicago. this city is the best place to be. it has sooo much to offer. i will never love another city as much as i love this one. i love beauty;; make up, hair, clothes, shoes. all of it. i love experimenting with new ideas, and follow a daily skin regimen. i have two pitbulls, a male and female whom i love soooo very much. the male is my big baby and the female is my attack dog ;]
i am very domesticated. i am obsessed with a clean home. i am constantly cleaning. i love the smell of a clean home, and love looking at recently vacuumed carpets. i am also in charge of the finances, and are always on top of them. my credit score is finally one to admire, and i plan to keep it that way.
i'm girly, loving, and everyone tells me im the funniest person they've ever met. i love to laugh but enjoy making others laugh even more. most of the time i'm being a sarcastic asshole, and therefore you should never take what i say to heart. i enjoy making people feel good about themselves, and pushing confidence back into girls who have lost their self-esteem, whether from a boyfriend or otherwise.
so this is a
little about myself. i would love to read others' blog pages, and learn about you all as well so please don't hesitate to post your blog link as a comment here, and i will share my two cents at my earliest convenience!
thanks doll faces && i look forward to building my blog site up from the ground up to the stars in the sky.