Support The Cause

As mentioned before, I am a strong advocate for Child Abuse Awareness. Children are my everything. The sight of any child being hurt, or a tear running down their cheeck makes me want to do everything in my power to create an everlasting smile.

All children should wear one thing at all times, and that's smile.

below are a few questions most people have asked me on how they can get involved. i started off doing all i do by a simple google search. you have to want to make a change in order to do so. hopefully this blog post is very informational for many of you. comment in the section below if you have any other questions or concerns!! Helping out all boils down to one's responsibility && most importantly, one's courage. The answers to stopping this plague (thats exactly what child abuse is in my eyes) are responsibility and courage. I understand most people don't really know what goes on behind close doors of one's family, which is why I try my best to help other's acknowledge some uncomfortable realities.

How do I help?

1. By learning the facts. Could you spot an abuser? I mean, truly spot one? If you answered yes, you should be shot.

2. By minimizing opportunity. Believe it or not, most abusers groom their victims and their families before they act.

3. By talking about it. Kids don't know they can say no. They are completely ignorant to anything and everything.

4. By staying alert. Learn how to spot signs of abuse... other than physical signs.

5. By having a plan. Believe the child. Very few reported incidents are false. How and Where would a child make this stuff up?

6. By acting on suspicions. Trust your intuition. Ask questions...

7. By getting involved. This is a huge human challenge that can be impacted by collective power if you know what to do...


Sadly, child abuse is a generational CURSEEE!! But it can be stopped if we shine a light on the problem and expose it. Abusers depend on our innocence and our IGNORANCE! They hide in plain sight.. hence my number one step. I hope after reading this one of you might be more aware, I know once I started doing some research, I never looked at the world the same.

I am constantly on a handful of different web sites every day. I copied and pasted the websites that are in my favorites, but you can easily just find other ones by doing a simple google.com search.

Just go to Google.com && copy and paste each title below to go to the website.


Stop Child Trafficking Now
The Kempe Center for the Prevention & Treatment of Child Abuse & Neglect
Klaas Kids Foundation 888-99-KLAAS
Childhelp
Teen Dating Abuse Hotline
Safe Havens for Newborns
drusvoice
The Joyful Child
radKIDS.org
Circle of Trust bill
Orrin Hudson "Be Someone"
Blake's Bright Tomorrow
Carlie's Crusade Foundation
National Center for Missing & Exploited Children
Parents of Murdered Children
CASA
SEX OFFENDER INFORMATION
Darkness to Light
National Sex Offender Registry
The Jessica Marie Lunsford Foundation
Support victims of childhood sexual abuse


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one of my favorite little excerpts:

He came into my life when I was just a little girl I was happy and young And then he changed my world One night I was in bed And he came to say goodnight except he took a little longer before he turned out the light He really hurt me that night And I didn't know what to do. I thought it happened to most well every little boy and girl.

I lay in bed that night Hurting inside and out tears streaming down my face I tried hard not to shout out I put that tragic night to the back of my head playing games at school there was nothing to be said A year had passed along and then it happened again. My mum was out at work it was him and me again I was sat next to him just watching the TV when he pulled me close to him and again molested me I thought it only happened once When I had done something bad but now I knew I was wrong I felt alone and sad And 8 years on I got the courage to tell someone the police got involved and stuff I was hated by my mum she kicked me out that day and stuck right by his side saying I was attention seeking and that it was all lies so in the end it got too much and I told the police I lied everything went back to normal I swear I wish I'd died

everything was going well until he sent me those texts saying he would kill himself it was all my fault instead so I went back to the police and told them it all again he's moved out for now. its investigating time again but my mum still hates me and thinks its all a lie. I feel so alone right now I wish I would just die I've told a couple of friends but its hard for them you see, to put up with something as stupid as a teenager like me. all I do is mope and cry because no-one understands what I feel inside each day

please someone take my hand.

I cut myself sometimes. When the pain gets too much I hate him for what he did and where he used to touch I often think I'll run away or step into the road my future seems so black and dim. I'm only 17 years old And if the case is dropped he will come back home again and I'll be back to where I began... In a world of sadness and pain I hope someone hears my cry and says they understand I just don't know what to do anymore I'm scared and on my own... So you see I'm stuck forever I just want to scream and shout But there's something you have to know

That for me, there's no way out 

So for all of you who messaged me wanting to know more information :: i hope this helps.

Sex Toy Party

 hello  my lovely readers!!

Have you ever been to a sex toy party? Yes, you read that right. How many of you just blushed and made sure no one else was looking at your screen? ;) I know, I know.... Often times, when people hear this, they think one word… orgy!! As much as I would love to say I participated in an all-female-sex-a-thon, I did not. We sat around in a circle and watched the hostess demonstrate all of the products. There were pheromone enhanced bath bubbles, vanilla flavored lube, edible body shimmer, and just about every kind of vibrator known to (wo)man. Ever heard of the “Silky Stud”? How about the “Aquasaki”? Not only did I get my hands on all these things, but I also got a crash course in erotic massage and some wild sex positions. Oh, and I can’t forget to mention I won a prize for drawing the best looking penis with my eyes closed. Now there is something I can put on a resume someday. ;)

Basically sex toy parties are just silly fun for girls who are a little more on the adventurous side, which happens to be the only side I have. When the hostess brought The Rabbit out, I couldn’t help but grin. Next came The Mini Tongue, another stress reliever of mine... haha just keeeding. "Who needs a guy when you can just fire up the Hitachi Magic Wand?" said the party hostess. Of course nothing compares to real sex… real GOOD sex. The party hostess asked me if I had a vibrator or ever used one, unfortunately no i have not. I said "why have one, and waste money on one when i have my boyfriend right by my side ready to go?"

And her answer was amazing.

"Because there are about a million things that can go wrong when having sex with someone, I think it is important to have a “sure thing” sitting around just in case. "

Brilliant answer, right? It definitely got a few girls to bite the bait and buy one, but i did not. I only ended up spending about $75.00 at the sex toy party and not a single thing I bought required batteries or penetration... LOL. Instead, I opted for products I thought were very unique. 

Nipple Nibblers by Surprise Parties

Smoothie Massage Cream by Surprise Parties

Pure Instinct Pheromone Cologne by Surprise Parties

Both lotions taste like candy and make my skin extremely soft. I tested out the pheromone cologne when i went to the bar the other day with my girl friend.. and I didn’t notice too much of a difference considering there are men all over us when we go out as it is.. lol I put spots of it on my chest, wrists, and neck and although it made me smell lovely, it didn’t seem to have an effect on any man. That’s OK though. I still love the scent and I am going to use it all the time.

I understand a lot of this stuff is just a total gimmick and there is some asshole out there making alot of money on the fact that women will buy anything to enhance certain aspects of their life. This is also OK.

Why? Because everything about life is a gimmick.

People tell you they are genuine and trustworthy but they just end up being a faded spot of perfume on your skin with a promise to do so much more than smell good. In saying this, I will take the chance with the sex appeal enhancement simply because I have nothing to lose. 

I will also take the chance in saying I am not the only girl out there that will admit she loves sex.

Pleasure should never be shameful ;-)

[[ s.p.r.i.n.g f.a.s.h.i.o.n ]]

:: Spring ::

it's nature's way of saying "dress to impress showing less" ;-)  unfortunately in Chicago IL, we always get lulled into thinking spring is upon us all for us to get bombarded with two feet of snow a day later. Regardless though...  it was nice while it lasted, hopefully its a taste of whats to come. I’m dead set on leaving my winter wardrobe in storage, sexy as it may be, I cant wait to slip into my sexier spring and summer outfits!!

speaking of spring and summer outfits-- the spring trends this year i am going crazy for. emereld is the color of the year -- & i am a big teal fan so meh, close enough. i wanted to share all of the trends i am loving (off the shoulders, halters, pastels, etc) && the trends i am hating (loose shorts, peplums, etc) along with trends that have never went out of style in my book (maxis, short shorts, mini dresses, etc!!)


accessories ::

clear clutches

stripes clutch

favorite dresses ;;

    

More Plain, Lounging Dresses:

sporty ;;

::  Sweatsuit jumpers -- my two favorite LOVE PINK ones  ::

trends i am so not digging ;;

Dorsel Flats Shoes

 

Mom Jeans:

any one else loving or hating any of the above items? let me know if i missed any thing !!

new trends i'm admiring

hello my lovelies!

since i've been working at this new job, i have enjoyed everything that has come with it. the people, the atmosphere, etc is so great. not to mention the male employees do not attempt to get in my pants.

Speaking of the female employees, about 80% of them are absolutely gorgeous and what I have noticed about the girls here at this salon is that they are very trendy, and always dress to impress. Some of the outfits and accessories they wear are things I have would've never considered to wear before, or things I would’ve thought looked tacky. lately, they've been rocking some incredible garments lately, and i wanted to address the trends i have been admiring lately.

For a lot of girls, having the most sparkles and the biggest boobs are top priority on their to do list. I like to wear things that are cute and sexy, but also functional. By functional, I mean I  like to be able to bend over and pick up a pen without having my panties show or my top go so far up my back you see my bra strap, etc.

Here are some examples:


i saw a lot of cute headbands at www.shopmasons.com for very cheap price, and a lot of good deals when buying multiple ones at once. I love head bands because they keep your hair in place, and can make an otherwise messy hair day look cute!

I do own a few flower head bands but they are kind of non compliant with my silky hair, they fall off/out of place often and just annoy me.. so I’d rather save them for shopping trips or a lunch date with a friend where i can pause and adjust them every other hour or so. I have not tapped into the rhinestone jewelry craze but I love the way it looks on some girls, girls







i'll be the first to admit i am not big on having the latest trends in my closet, I do not care to be"in" or what not. i have my own unique style, and wear things that suit my taste and that i think will look good on me, not what others think. Nor am i one to spend oodles and oodles of money on an item or service i consider ridiculously priced.

my favorite word is clearance & i can never pass up a great deal. therefore stores that i really enjoy shopping at are outlet malls, stores like discovery and dots, any thrift store lol which are both excellent discount stores as well. I like Forever 21, Wet Seal, Charlotte Russe, However when I do have the money to spend, or if someone like my mom is treating me to a shopping spree like she normally does-- Bebe, Guess, Express, etc are the stores at the top of my list.

Another trend that has been no secret since they first came into fruition is hair extensions !!!

this is a trend that i think any girl can rock, and itll look bomb! Of course for a female, having the edge is very important;; and Hair extensions are definitely my thing. I swear by the Euronext brand that is sold at Sally’s Beauty Supply. They are real human hair, easy to style, and you are able to unclip them at the end of the night as opposed to spending hundreds to have them glued directly into your hair. I have very long hair as it is, but it's more on the thin stringy side. i have a lot of it, so it looks thick, but when it comes to styling-- it's just not there. lol So therefore I use the extensions to add volume and help with different styles.



i suggest reading magazines is a great way to check out latest styles, see how the stars dress, and wear their hair and make up. i just love to read cosmopolitan mags and see the new trends, check out my little collection i got going.. hehe =p i also love glamour and allure, etc i'm still undecided about Vogue...i don't think i'd ever spend my own money on buying an issue.. even though i am not that into fashion i still consider it interesting as to what pieces come around especially ones that were popular in the 70s and 80s or the past itself.


history does repeat itself my friends :)





so if any of my readers have any new trends they are trying, let me know in a comment!! i would love to hear how other girls rock out.

a work of art

i just recently returned from a lovely trip.

A trip to visit a fellow writer, in fact. Instead of drinking til we vomit, the two of us opted for more ordinary activities. We went for a walk thru Grant Park, on the day of a music festival. We had a nice outdoor patio lunch, and then returned to her condo for a movie and junk food night. It was just us two girlies, and i don't remember the last time i have had so much fun. we talked about everything that was going on in our lives, but this time i did something different and that is i did more of the listening instead of the speaking... didn't work out to well to say the least, haha.

I also received a wonderful "just because, long time no see" present that I just can not stop looking at. I was given a painting, not of an animal or a place, but of myself.

On one side, there is me holding one of my books, dressed in a conservative button up shirt and sweater. On the other side, I am donning a sexy school girl outfit equipped with a garter and some fantastic cleavage, given my current situation and all this was a pretty important factor =) I can not express how touched I was by how much work was put into it and I am so thrilled to add it to my collection of erotic pictures.

One degenerate can paint. the other can write.  && we both look like we belong to two seperate social groups.  Is this really possible?

My painting is not the only work of art I laid my eyes on this past weekend. We were wandering around Barnes and Noble the other day and a book caught my eye.

 Suicide Girls: Beauty Redefined.

It was larger than all of the other paperbacks in its section and I was immediately intrigued by its cover. A punky looking cartoon girl with a very sexy smirk on her face. I knew it had to be photography of some sort by the shape of the book so I wasted no time taking a look. What I saw within the pages completely blew me away. Suicide Girls: Beauty Redefined turned out to be a collection of erotic photography, but it was not your typical female models. Most of these girls were covered in tattoos and had piercings in spots I didn’t know one could pierce... lol

They were dark with the occasional blast of color, either in the hair, make up, or background, and best of all, they were completely naked. And sexy. Unbelievably sexy. I was then asked if I would pose for anything like that. My answer… in a heart beat. However, there are certain things that would have to fall into place before I would be able to take on such an endeavor.


 First of all, I would have to be sure my reputation could take such a blow.. haha but then again at this point who am i really trying to impress any more?? a photograph can follow you everywhere though.. and second of all, I am not as bad ass as the Suicide Girls. I have only one small, modest tattoo  but have always wanted a small, modest tattoo and I think a lot of make up overwhelms my features, so i don't wear much. Of course I can rock out in front of a camera so I think I would be OK regardless of the rather “bare” exterior... hehe

If I ever did something like this, I would want people to have the same reaction I did when I opened the book. & that is.. she is not just a nude body. she is a rule breaker.. a symbol of strength . radiant .fierce as tyra banksss. she spreads her legs for the sake of art. for the sake of beauty. && those uncovered lips are shouting fuck you. while the other set of lips are screaming fuck me. it's art. she is aware of the consequences, yet takes the risk. i guess it's because nothing is as tragic as a girl that gives in..

damn.

need to get out of this funk --

If you ever been depressed, then maybe you know where I’m coming from. It’s like one minute you’re fine, and the next minute something happens that makes you think— i mean really think — and then you’re totally empty. The only thoughts that are in your head are negative and it makes you feel totally done, like you don’t mean anything to anyone.

All you want to do is tell someone how you feel, but you don’t want their pity, even if you could tell someone, nothing would come out right. You don’t want to laugh, or smile, or whine, or argue or be stubborn or difficult, you just want to go to bed and cry and hope this feeling passes, and sometimes it does, but it always seems to come back.

You think that all your friends hate you and only talk to you because they feel bad for you. You know complete strangers judge you just because of how you look and act, and when you think about how you’re not as beautiful as the crowd that surrounds you, it makes you feel even worse. And of the two people that are supposed to love you the most in the world, one left you, and the other is exceptional, but at the same time is still that you can love forever, who will never cheat on you or play you, who will go out of his way to make you happy but then again not get past his own pride when it comes to certain situations.

Sometimes you just want to give up, you want so desperately to be alone, but at the same time fear it so much. You know how it feels to know that your not a bad person, just sometimes do bad things, just sometimes have bad habits, just some times let your emotions get the better of you... that you desperately do not want to let your friends down and always try your hardest not to be selfish, isolated, self conscious, bitter, whiny, or obsessive.

so you listen to what everyone else has to say, but you never tell them how you feel, because that would mean revealing part of yourself, and you just can’t do that; you can’t let anyone really know you. And your opinions wouldn’t matter to them anyways, and most of all if you took the time to sit down and try to get all your feelings out for the first time in your life, it would be completely over whelming.

Gosh.. I need to get out of this funk.

love -- a figment of our imagination

when it comes to men and women ...
Who are more dominant? Who should be more aggressive? Who do you think makes the first move.. is it the woman who shows interest that the male reacts to? or is it the male who approaches the woman where she then reacts back?

sadly, men have egos that bruise. They go to great lengths to avoid being humiliated, embarrassed, diminished, ridiculed, or told the truth. And they're especially averse to brawling with irate husbands and boyfriends. So they approach with caution or not at all. Also, it's a scientific fact that men are attracted to women by criteria far more complex and enduring than mere pulchritude. They really are honest --- well, a\\ome of them.

It's a little like fishing, isn't it? Men make the choice in that they are ever trolling. And women decide, based on how much they are attracted to the fisherman, whether to take the bait. Or is it the women who do the trolling?

Being "in love" is usually a euphoric feeling, usually towards a particular individual. More often than not, though, someone who is "in love" is really "in love with being in love." This type of feeling is usually short-lived, as jealousy or doubt can easily kill the feeling.

Loving someone, on the other hand, means wishing the best for them no matter what. It involves a commitment that goes beyond feelings. You can love someone so much that you let them go after others, if you feel that's what's best for them.

Does true love really exist? You know, the kismet kind. The kind that envelopes two spirits before they've even met; the kind Shakespeare must have been writing about in Romeo and Juliet; the kind that makes you give up everything familiar, moral, safe, to walk in the direction of destiny.

love has three phases: the infatuation stage, the bonding stage and the familiar stage. it helps to consider all three phases when trying to figure out whether or not it's the real thing.

But, if it's true love, does it warrant dissecting and breaking down into stages? Do you have to consider anything at all; or, is it just "so"?

nine ways to tell if the love you have for your partner is the real thing:

1. You feel good.
2. You look forward to spending time with your partner, without sex on the mind.
3. You respect your partner, and his or her feelings.
4. You're interested in what your partner thinks, and want to know what at all times.
5. You accept your partner's quirks and flaws, some might even be cute.
6. You're able to work through your problems, and have great communication.
7. You feel safe. (You're not afraid of losing your partner.) Stability is a constant
8. You can't explain why you're together.. but also couldn't explain why you'd leave eachother
9. You don't compare your partner to others, or previous exes in your past.

Think about those ^