Reduce Hate (Start with yourself)

So I've been on Facebook quite a bit lately, and I've been seeing so many different friends of mine saying how much they hate themselves, their lives, their family... And while I am sure all of them have their own version of each reason, I pretty much summed it up to a few reasons why:

rejection. love. acceptance. hitting life's bottom.

(A) Rejection We all must face rejection in our lives. Rejection from members of the opposite sex, rejection over a promotion at work, rejection at a life that does not measure up to the big plans we once had. Rejection will come, but we must not let it consume us. I have learned in the past that when rejection comes, it is not the end of the world. Sure, there are times I am depressed for a little while and there is a lot of self-examination, but over time I learned that rejection is not the end, but the beginning of something else.. something so much more beautiful.

(B): Love and Acceptance It is human nature to want to feel the love and acceptance of others, but when it doesn't happen in our timetable, we often turn to ourselves as the source of our failure. When someone does not accept or show love to you, don't hate yourself for it. Rather, take time to consider the situation surrounding why you were not accepted or loved. In the end, you will realize (like I did) that not everyone is going to accept you and love you. If you stay true to who you are, sooner or later you will find the love and acceptance you are looking for.

(C): Hitting Rock Bottom Have you ever felt like you've hit bottom? I'm talking about those times when you say, "If I only had one break, I know I could get out of this situation I am in." I can't help but think of Eminem's song titled "Rock Bottom." At one time in my life, that song spoke to me clearer than I spoke to myself. I know I have had quite a few times like that in my life and it is not a nice feeling. Many times when we are at rock bottom, we become extremely depressed that can lead to self-pity and self-pity can cause us to say, "I hate myself" for not being able to get out of this... funk. That funk can lead us to a downward spiral of self destruction before we even realize it.

Most of the time when we hit rock bottom it is by circumstances of our own making. In our minds, we feel that since we are the one who caused the problem we should be the ones to get ourselves out of the problem. When things continue to spiral downward, we start to play the blame game which always leads to wrong conclusions about ourselves. In the end, we start to hate ourselves for allowing things to get this bad. When you hit bottom, don't hate yourself. Swallow your pride and seek help ...don't be in denial. Help should always be welcomes with a warm embrace.

Hold yourself accountable for what you did to get to this point.

I know my strengths and weaknesses, and GUESS WHAT? I am going to make more mistakes, but I can't let the mistakes get to me. I know it sounds simple and it will take work, but when you make a mistake, learn from it and move on.

The words "I hate myself" by themselves hold no power over us, but the problem starts when you begin to believe the words. There were times I hated who I was and wanted to change myself so I could be like everyone else. Then one day I realized that I am not like everyone else. I am me, so I set out to be me and I soon found that I really love who I am. I did not take the things that happened to me so personally anymore. I do not know if it will work for you, but isn't it worth a shot?